No it does not feel good at all. Everything feels just weird. You dont feel close as usual but in another way. What the fuck am i suppossed to do when this is over? Because i guess it is all upp to you now when we go down or up. But if you dont? I cannot turn to anyone but death. Sure i can try pushing the dates myself if im betrayed but in the end it is up to you. Give me something to hold on to please!!! Im not ready to end ”US”.. if that is the case cant we go on a lil while longer? Because even tho im probably not gonna have you here with me, i still have some hope with you. But same time i dont want to go on like this if i have a chance at having you close all the times. 

Anyways so im moving out of hyllie tomorrow… gonna pack and clean my apartment on my own.. and i dont even have a working needle. You need me to puncture my vein totally or what? And it is raining… everything feels the opposite to how i imagined this day would feel.. it would not be a sunday, it would not Rain, i would not be out of drugs (no more hash left), and idk it just doesnt work itself together in my brain. Yeah i do those things we did tonight but i cannot feel any difference and i really think i should. If you really are coming; can you not just make it a lil easier for me and give me some bulletproofs proofs? Yeah i can try but yeah whatever….