the words the world offer are empty, empty shells loaded With certain energies in certain directions. But when you reach the words destination, the energy just disappears.. i chase the right words to find the right ways, but they are full of nothing, empty of all. I dont know where im going, where im heading and when ill be there. I dont even know if i care. I was told im protected, that im surrounded by ppl who keep their eyes on me. How does that help? If its even true… because now im heading back to my apartment and i goddamn well know i will be sitting there alone in my ”bed” crying.. seeing and feeling no one… so how is that protection worth shit? It only protects me from what i dont need to be protected from, but it does not protect me from my dark feelings… then how could that be a good thing? so alone. so not cared for.. well since i obviously cant take care of myself and dont care enough to care about it or myself.. thats so uplifting, i have sold my soul to suffering and laid my life to depend on people who never even cared from the beginning, but was just all about the lies. I honestly feel right now that i have nothing left, everything i’ve lost or given up. And there is no option to go back in time and make changes so. I guess if i given everything up, then it is only me left.. should i?